crunchier:

mom: so hun i was in your room

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and i accidentally started going through your stuff

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and i found your phone

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it was unlocked so i went through your messages too, who’s alex? is that your boyfriend? you can totally talk to me about crushes and boys!!!

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(via parkingstrange)

16,583 notes

xplosivediarrhea:

the sun’s pretty hot… id fuck it

(Source: j6, via asian)

164,022 notes

tiorickyaoi:

"i need a movie where there are kickass female characters"image

"i need a movie where the main characters aren’t attractive"image

"i need a movie with annoying talking animals"

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"i need a movie where the main character lives in a swamp"

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"i need a movie that has all star by smash mouth on the soundtrack"

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(Source: tiorickyaoi, via asian)

142,466 notes

alpha-toothless:

rhinse:

crushes are terrible

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(via itsmemacleod)

268,329 notes

callieohpeee:

when i was around 5 i asked my mom why “some people were different colors” and she said “because god wanted lots of flavors” and let me tell you that was the wrong thing to say because for the next 3 years i thought god ate people when they died

(Source: fujiwaranomokou, via parkingstrange)

237,133 notes
Creepy Stories: MY WIFE

sixpenceee:

This one has a medium length but bear with it because it is worth it. One of the stories to really toy with your mind.

Original Author:  Mr. Pengy

Read More

1,673 notes

illieous:

concertoinc4:

youths-haven:

incognito-author:

vacidicar:

spadenightmaren:

what if your phobias are based off how you died in a past life

Why is this not getting around faster

DUDE

Noooo

no you don’t understand, I have a phobia of skulls and spiders.  I think I was killed by a skulltula.

Actually this is a belief in many cultures that your phobia is how you died in a past life.

(via homie-sexxual)

125,979 notes

spyyy:

reifaun:

your body is 93% stardust so dont give up little star (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

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(via joshpeck)

125,963 notes
If celery is 90% water, is the ocean 10% celery?

necrosummer:

as a scientist I can confirm that this is definitely how percentages and fractions work, and yes, the ocean is 10% celery, which is why we cannot drink ocean water, for we would choke on the celery

(Source: vvhaleshark, via asian)

68,034 notes

spagghetto:

"I’m not mad I’m just disapointed"

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(via parkingstrange)

30,713 notes

precumming:

intergalacticsloth:

precumming:

precumming:

did you guys follow me cause you liked my blog?

well they def didnt follow you for your looks

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Did u just diss yourself

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(via tipslip)

150,400 notes